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Do You Know Your Dating Why?

Another Friday night rolls around and you know what that means: dinner and a movie or just staying at home with your date. Somewhere along the way, what was once scintillating has become a so-so experience.

If this sounds like you and you’ve found yourself in a dating rut, it may be time to step back and examine your dating “why.” Rediscovering your dating purpose might put the passion back in your dating life. Read on for some inspiration to get your game back on track.

All fun and games.

While it’s important to rediscover your purpose, that doesn’t mean it’s time to get serious. It’s perfectly reasonable to date for the fun of it. Try taking your date to new places. Have you always wanted to try that ax-throwing joint? Now’s the time! Don’t forget that dating is the perfect format for trying new things. Even if the relationship doesn’t last, the memories will.

Meet your match.

Romance is a source of sensual satisfaction, but it can also be so much more than that. It can also be a rich source of emotional, mental, emotional, and intellectual challenges. If you’re looking for a sparring mate—someone who can do the Sunday morning crossword puzzle with you or beat your best marathon time— keep that in mind before you agree to meet up for coffee. If you enjoy a challenge, you won’t be happy until you meet your match.

Happily, ever after.

Maybe you didn’t start out looking for lifelong love. But somewhere along the way, your motive has changed. It’s important to take inventory in your wants and needs. A summer fling might have felt right last year, but this year it’s left you wanting more. Just make sure that you’re clear with whoever you’re dating when your purpose changes, so that everyone is on the same page.

Companionship.

One of the most satisfying aspects of a romantic relationship is developing an enduring friendship. Ask any couple who has celebrated their 50-year anniversary, and they’ll tell you that feelings of romance may fade, but friendship is the bedrock that never erodes. This is a wonderful motivation for dating.

Getting to know yourself.

Sometimes the best reason for dating isn’t getting to know the person across the table—it’s getting to know yourself. Self-knowledge is key to any successful relationship. Through dating, you will learn your wants, needs, desires, and interests.

We all lose touch with our motives sometimes. In love, as in the rest of life, it’s important to take stock of what matters to you and clarify your dating “why.”